Youth ministry is a funny thing. Kids get attached so quickly and easily. They show affection at the drop of a hat (or after only knowing you for a few days...or hours). And believe me, I am not complaining. There is little in life that's just as purely good as a big hug, or a junior high student saying, "Get in the pool with me!" and tugging on your arm, or a high school girl giving an example about how her dad loves her mom by making her coffee in the morning. But in some ways this quickness to get attached worries me...not for their sake, but for mine. I hope and pray to be a good example and to be someone safe for them to talk to. I work towards showing the love of God, at being transparent, at being humble and doing the right thing. I want them to know both the adoption of God and the love of Christ on the cross. Sometimes I get worried I'm not doing them justice, that it's not enough and when they realize this, they might feel betrayed by their attachment. And then...I remember that God's grace is sufficient.
I am praying right now that God's grace will always be sufficient, that God's grace will outshine my desire to be "the-best-youth-intern-ever!" and my own selfish desire to be liked, that God's grace will put those wishes in their place. After all, youth ministry, especially with a
very small junior high group, is all about a ministry of presence...a ministry of just showing up and hanging out and being a vessel for God to dwell within. That's all I am...a tool, a beautiful tool of God's.
