Today's FUNNY

This just seemed so apropos given all my recent travel...

"RULES FOR FREQUENT FLIERS

1. No flight ever leaves on time unless you are running late and need the
delay to make the flight.

2. If you are running late for a flight, it will depart from the farthest
gate within the terminal.

3. If you arrive very early for a flight, it inevitably will be delayed.

4. Flights never leave from Gate #1 at any terminal in the world.

5. If you must work on your flight, you will experience turbulence as soon
as you touch pen to paper. Or start to drink your coffee. Or try to type on
your laptop.

6. If you are assigned a middle seat, you can determine who has the seats
on the aisle and the window while you are still in the boarding area. Just
find the two largest passengers.

7. Only passengers seated in window seats ever have to get up to go to the
bathroom.

8. The crying baby on board your flight is always seated next to you.

9. The less carry-on luggage space available on an aircraft, the more
carry-on luggage passengers will bring aboard."

FUNNY courtesy of Mikey's Funnies